Retreating from Regret

The mask
The mask is coming off.
Sound, slicing through
The stale night air,
Stands pale
Against the sky of black
Waving, curling, weaving,
Drifting on a dream,
Floating on a misconception
Of beauty.
And what it all means.
Beauty equates
And all else fades away.
Failure can never redeem
The pain I felt then.
Scars remain and the lie remains.
The lie
That pain melts away
With Time.
It scars deeper,
Burrowing in the depths
Of my innermost weaknesses,
Shining out at my moments,
Moments of vulnerability,
Gathering momentum
With each brush
Of warm Skin.

Push and drag
Your jewels through the mud.
Carry your own shit
On your own shoulders.
I’ve got my own
Pulling me down
Down to my basic levels.
The measure of a man
Seems insignificant now,
Now that I’m naked
And standing in the light.
Make way for the king
Of the world
Limited by his own
Tears that hang on the lashes,
Never releasing
Adding moisture to the breeze.
Insult to injury
I smell my own stench
Afraid to share it with others.

Whom do I distrust?
Thoughts on my existence?
Can it be that bad?
Will I ever find out?
Never – as long
As I melt with magma
The core of my sins
Hidden, brooding, boiling,
Hatred spurning
Where did it come from?
Did the breezes return?
Carrying life back
In an unending circle?
It remained all along
Just in different places
At different times.
`Tis the curse
Of he who gives blessings.

Bless this one, oh Lord
Bless her
Make her whole
With or without me,
Love runs its course.